An American Disaster: Marriage!
An American Disaster: Marriage! Divorce isn't okay. Divorce in the United States is taken for granted today. It is considered as normal as getting married. We comment 'that's too bad' and move on. Divorce is a bigger deal than the 'ho hum' consideration we give it. If the divorce rate is 30% or higher it is truly a disaster.The obvious sufferers are children who become torn between two parents and suffer emotionally. The impact to children is devastating and a negative factor. The children can be scarred for life. They will learn positively or negatively what kind of parent or spouse they should be. Their learning experience is more than likely going to be negative, frustrating and bitter as they grow up through divorce. Now this isn't always the case but all too often it is a negative experience. Now what kind of parent or spouse will they become? What kind of cycle is occurring so regularly in our society? Another major issue is economic. After great expenditures to be married on the front end the back end divorce has a cost factor as well. A good percentage of the divorce split up of assets goes to attorneys. Some of the couples assets go to marriage counselors. Marriage is an economic industry. Many make a living on DIVORCES! If their living depends on divorce they wouldn't want everyone to completely get along. Does a counselor want a couple to immediately straighten out there problems or go through a year of sessions? Who really cares? Couples and their friends and families must care and take responsibility.Most will agree that divorce is probably a better option than to stay in a miserable negative situation. This can have terrible consequences as well. So let's avoid divorce as best we can. Here we are focussing on preventive maintainance. Couples have to take responsibility and should take the decision of marriage seriously. It is essential to do marriage homework before getting married to ensure it is the right time, the right decision and the right person.It is the responsibility of the couples of course to make the best decision that they can prior to getting married. It should become the responsibility of the 'village' of friends and family to help. People fall in love today based upon TODAY'S INFORMATION. People today are mostly aware of how they feel today, mostly concerned with how they feel today and not interested in anything that might disturb how they feel today. It's okay to be care free when you date casually but when you become serious about a lifetime decision, GET SERIOUS. Typically they won't look beyond the strong feelings of today. They need help. Whether they request it our not we all need help.Most people feel another couple's relationship is their business and they shouldn't get too involved. However one can make powerful suggestions that couples should be open to consider. Suggestions are in order for all of us when we are making one of the most important decisions in our life. If a couple gathers important information on their own-great. But it 'takes a village' to truly improve the world.Some suggestions that couples should do are 1) reading a few insightful books on marriage, 2) discuss future goals and ambitions, 3) discuss kids and the rearing of, 4) discuss economic issues, 5) discuss the couple's skill sets and 6) determine how mature each person truly is.If a person gets married but is trying to find him or herself, 5 years later when that person finds themself they may find a person who doesn't like their spouse or just doesn't want to be married. A marital decision is more likely to be a successful one if it is made by two mature and developed individuals. All too often, regardless of age, people get married for the wrong reasons or before they have grown to be more understanding of themselves and the world around them. The village should communicate some level of help or make suggestions. The village should never say two people are grown and they can do whatever they want. We rarely accomplish great things all by ourselves. It truly does take a village. It will ultimately be up to couples to listen to suggestions but suggestion are in order. Perhaps we can create a different cycle that exists today by taking a proactive and preventive approach rather than our current spectator approach.For More Information On Creating Successful Marriages Go Here